How to Get Divorced

Divorce and the dissolution of a civil partnership can be a distressing, confusing and a generally frustrating time. As experienced divorce solicitors, we share advice below on how to best manage a divorce. Read on to discover what to expect from a divorce and the important steps to take. For the purpose of the information given we refer generally to divorce, but the same principles apply to the dissolution of a civil partnership.

It is important to remember that:
You can only apply for a divorce once you have been married for at least a year.

A divorce is a legal process to end a marriage between two people. The length and cost of the divorce process is largely prescribed by law following the introduction of the no fault divorce although application for the final order can in some circumstances be delayed if there are outstanding financial issues. There are inbuilt time frames so the quickest you can complete the process now is around 6-7 months. This does vary from case to case, depending on individual circumstances.

It is worth noting that the divorce only deals with the marriage termination itself, rather than settling financial issues or child arrangements These will need to be dealt with separately from a divorce.

The typical process to end a divorce can be narrowed down to five key steps. These are outlined below.

1. The initial divorce application
The application for a divorce can be completed either as a sole or a joint application on the premise that the marriage or civil partnership has broken down irretrievably. In a sole application, your spouse will be sent a copy of the divorce application form as well as an acknowledgement of service form. As joint applicants, you will both only be sent the acknowledgement of service form to confirm the application is being processed.

2. Acknowledgement of service
Completion of the form is generally a formality to confirm receipt of the divorce application. It is no longer possible to defend a divorce if you do not agree with it. However, you can ‘dispute’ the divorce if you are questioning the validity of the marriage or the jurisdiction of the court to proceed with the divorce in England and Wales. If you think either of these points may apply to you contact us for advice as you will need to note your objections in the acknowledgment of service form.

It is a good idea to try to agree with your ex-spouse at this stage when the Final Order of divorce will be applied for (see below) as it is often advisable to delay applying for that until a final financial order is made. This is particularly pertinent where there are pensions as death of one of you during the course of the divorce proceedings may still lead to the other receiving widow’s benefits under a pension, whereas death between the conclusion of the divorce and the making of a financial order can lead to financial loss of those.

3. Reflection period – 20 weeks
There is a mandatory waiting period of 20 weeks after the divorce application is issued. At the end of this period, a conditional order can be applied for. The waiting period can give time for reflection to ensure that the applicant still wishes to proceed with the termination of the marriage. Practically it also gives time to endeavour to reach agreement regarding the split of finances and also to agree child arrangements.

4. The Conditional Order
After the reflection period, a conditional order can be applied for (by post or online) which in turn is the court’s confirmation that it does not see a reason why you cannot divorce. Once the order is reviewed and granted, you will receive a Certificate of Entitlement to notify you.

5. Final Order – 6 weeks and a day
Once the conditional order has been granted, there is another mandatory waiting period of 6 weeks and a day before the Final Order can be applied for. This is to allow time for further reflection. Once a Final Order is granted, your marriage will be legally over. As mentioned above, it can be advisable to delay the application for a Final Order until a final financial order has been made.

There is only one ground for divorce – that the marriage has irretrievably broken down. As the divorce proceedings cannot be defended, the divorce will be granted provided there is appropriate jurisdiction and the relevant applications for the conditional and final order are made.

The new no-fault divorce regime removes the blame associated with divorce proceedings and prevents a party from defending the application. This is to remove a lot of conflict and animosity from the separation and should allow divorces to progress far more smoothly than they have historically.

The ease of the divorce process will depend on multiple factors as financial settlements and child arrangements can delay proceedings. It is possible to avoid court proceedings by using Alternative Dispute Resolution, with multiple options including Mediation, Arbitration and Early Neutral Evaluation. You can read more about this here.

In order to apply for a divorce, you must complete a divorce application. If you wish to handle this yourself, you can get a divorce application online from the GOV.UK website. However, a popular option is for a divorce solicitor to apply on your behalf as they can handle all the divorce paperwork on your behalf. This can be extremely helpful since they will always have access to the most up-to-date forms and can offer legal advice if required.

In the application, you will need to provide your details, along with those of your spouse including your addresses and full names.  You will also need to provide some basic information listed on your marriage certificate.

As well as the application, the court will require a copy of your original marriage certificate.

You will need to send or upload a scanned colour copy of your marriage certificate. A certified copy can be applied for if you no longer have the original for a small fee. Once the divorce application has been sent, the court will consider the divorce paperwork.

You can divorce after one year of marriage. If you have been married for under a year, but would like a divorce, there are alternative options. These include judicial and legal separations which enable you to live apart prior to applying for a divorce or ending a civil partnership. You can also consider an annulment in certain circumstances.

Separation agreements may show the parties’ intentions on how they wish to proceed with divorce proceedings. This can extend to setting out which party might be the sole Applicant or whether you will be joint Applicants and whether costs might be claimed.

A separation agreement is a working document setting out points of agreement relating to the division of finances as well as other issues such as where each person shall live, terms regulating occupation of property, and the movement of the children between each parent. It can also state intentions in relation to future divorce. It is not binding on a court in any divorce at a later date, but generally courts will be persuaded to follow the contents if they are broadly reasonable and there has been full financial disclosure between the couple and each person has had independent legal advice.

Separation agreements are “contracts” drawn up for the separating couple, reflecting their particular circumstances. As such, it can cover almost anything the parties want it to. This can include maintenance payments, how the bills will be paid and who will live in the family home.

It is crucial to have independent legal advice regarding this to help you understand what provisions are likely to be enforced. This is particularly the case when children are involved, or oversea assets must be considered.

For most, separation agreements will almost always include some provision for the couple’s financial arrangements, including:

1. Recording the date the parties separated, alongside any intention of divorce proceedings
2. Who might act as applicant (sole or joint)
3. The costs of those proceedings
4. What will happen to the property brought into the marriage and financial contributions made towards the family home.
5. What will happen to inherited property received during the marriage
6. What will happen to jointly owned properties and bank accounts
7. What will happen to any possessions or other personal belongings
8. What maintenance might be paid to either party
9. Whether the pension be split by way of pension sharing order on any future divorce
10. What arrangements have already been agreed.

It is important that you both have independent legal advice and that you each fully disclose your finances to the other and provide supporting documentation in relation to the same, in order to ensure the separation agreement has an increased chance of being followed by a court on divorce at a later date. You can read more about dividing money in divorce here.

Obtaining independent legal advice will ensure that your concerns, and matters important to you, are correctly represented within a separation agreement, and the advice that you each have from our own solicitor and the financial disclosure between you both can help ensure that provisions of the agreement are as binding as possible in the context of the current law.

A solicitor can also help protect your assets and provide financial security following the breakdown of your relationship.

Separation in family justice terms relates to the termination of the social construct of a party’s relationship. There is a subjective, informality associated with separation, e.g. the parties may be separated but still live together at the family home.

Divorce is the formal, administrative process of ending a marriage. Other options are available, for example, judicial separation, but are significantly less popular.

Hawkins Family Law is a family law specialist, which means we have years of experience with cases regarding divorce, separation and other family matters.

If you are considering a separation, or have recently separated and would like to know where you stand, our family law specialists will provide reliable and accredited legal advice.

Contact us to speak to one of our experienced and friendly team.

Separation is a complex and distressing period, especially without knowing the first step. Separating couples must begin the process of separating everything they previously shared, such as any finances and well as sorting child arrangements.

Below we share some advice on the best way to manage a separation effectively.

1. Communication
● You may both hear different things when discussing what appears to be the same point. This can be due to anxiety, the high emotional charge between you both and the fact that your needs and points of prime concern may well be different. Agreeing a form of communication such as email can assist. There are also apps that can be used such as Our Family Wizard which help to regulate the temperature and flow of correspondence. If you do wish to discuss issues it can often help to do this at a neutral venue away from the family home.
● You may feel that your ex-partner is being unreasonable at times, which can cause frustration and lead to conflict. To avoid this, we suggest setting clear boundaries, which can be done with the help of a solicitor.
● It should be acknowledged that emotions may well run high during the period of separation before practical points are finalised and agreed. Arguments over small issues which seem big at the time are to be expected but make every effort to walk away from a disagreement that is in danger of becoming heated as arguments can escalate more easily at this sensitive time in an unexpected and potentially volatile way.
● Whilst tensions are high, it is recommended that you communicate via a reliable written method such as email. This will allow you to consider what you are saying and whether this will be misconstrued by the other party. Text messages are often short in nature and more conversational and are sent quickly with less thought and so are potentially open to being misunderstood in content or tone. A more formal written method helps allow you to check your work to make sure you have covered everything you wish to say and provides a clear record through negotiations of what was said whilst also allowing time for the other person to digest the correspondence at their own pace.

2. Compassion
● The emotional side of separation is very rarely equally balanced as one of you may not have expected the marriage to end. Indeed, even a shared decision to end the marriage can be processed differently by each of you.
● It is vital to appreciate that everybody will deal with separation differently. Some may need time to grieve for a lost relationship, whilst others will seek solace by, for example, turning their attention elsewhere. Two people are involved in the separation, and to help proceedings flow smoothly, should endeavour to respect the others approach to dealing with the separation process.
● Respecting the fact that each individual will deal with divorce differently and
showing compassion towards your ex-spouse through that process will go a long way to salvaging a relationship long after the Final Order is pronounced. This is important not only to assist in talks to try to agree practical matters, but also in ensuring you can work together in the future in a good parental relationship if you have children.

3. Collaboration
● Working collaboratively through the divorce process will frequently reduce
animosity and conflict as parties separate.
● Coming to an agreement recognising what both parties want, their worries and concerns and how these can be managed, can be extremely beneficial as you will both have a better understanding of each other’s needs, both practical and emotional, which can then facilitate reaching overall agreement.
● Divorce proceedings and associated matters can be amicable overall if both parties are willing to work together on this. At Hawkins we have solicitors who are collaboratively trained to work with other collaborative solicitors to help you reach the best outcome in a civilised manner with discussion between you both and between your solicitors at the forefront.

4. Commitment
● When considering separation, it is important to have an idea of what you want at the end of the separation process. Both parties will have certain objectives, often different, but these do not have to be kept private. Sometimes, by sharing what you both want, this will help come to agreements about the aspects which are not in dispute. However, it is important to know what you are seeking and commit to those points that are important to you after discussion with your solicitor as to reasonableness in the overall context of your separation.
● If it is important to you that the children stay in the family home, to allow them to continue their education at a good, local school, commit to that position but
recognise that it may carry a cost. This may only be possible if you do not pursue other financial elements to accommodate for this.
● If it is important to you that the children see you have a positive relationship with your ex, commit to that position equally, but recognise that there may be a trade-off for this too. There will be disputes that may be of limited significance to you but of great importance to your ex. It is important to be able to compromise and not to purposefully disagree with your ex for the sake of it.
● There will be disputes over aspects of the separation and this is to be expected. However, you must choose your battles and in doing so talk matters through with your solicitor to ensure that you have a good prospect of success in any issue that is important to you. In standing your ground on one matter you will often have to provide a better prospect for the other person on another matter.

5. Compromise
● Compromising is not conceding. Compromising is finding a middle ground and both parties have to apply some give and take in so doing. Conceding is simply giving up on the matter. This distinction is important as it can be much more desirable for you to compromise with the other person in order to help you achieve your objectives. On other occasions you may concede a point in return for a gain on the wider negotiation.
● There is no weakness in compromise and recognising that both of you have valid positions which may contrast to each other is important as it can help you both come to fair conclusion on a given issue through open and honest communication.
● The final tip is to realise that both of you are not alone. There is always help and
support for those that need it. A trusted divorce solicitor can help with complex legal matters, or dealing with complicated financial elements by recommending other professionals such as accountants, independent financial advisors or mortgage brokers that you may need in the coming weeks and months.

Equally, there are resources for other necessary support too.

● The Citizens Advice Bureau will help provide information and guidance you wish to seek.

● Your GP, family and friends can all be confidants to help you get through the trickier times of a divorce.

● Counselling and other professional support can help you process the emotional
elements of divorce.

As family law specialists, we have years of experience with cases regarding divorce, family matters and more. If you are looking for reliable and accredited legal advice regarding your divorce or getting a divorce, speak to one of our team today.

If your application is rejected, the court will write to you informing you why this has happened. It may be that information is missing such as one parties full address. These issues can usually be resolved by writing to the court.

The court will provide your spouse with an Acknowledgement of Service form (D10). If you have applied as a sole applicant the acknowledgment of service form will prove that the other party has received the divorce application.

If you have made a joint application with your spouse, you both complete an Acknowledgement of Service form.

● An Acknowledgement of Service is the form that the Respondent (your spouse) in a divorce application receives. It needs to be completed carefully as it is the reply to the divorce application.

● Under the new no-fault divorce process, it is no longer possible to defend a divorce.

● A divorce can be disputed based on the validity of the marriage or jurisdiction. For example, if the person applying for a divorce lives abroad.

● Once the Acknowledgement of Service is completed, it must be sent back to the
court and the court will provide a copy to the applicant.

● If the Respondent does not complete the Acknowledgement of Service, then you need to consider how you can serve them with the divorce application.

● We usually suggest waiting at least 28 days before taking steps to deal with the lack of an acknowledgment. The divorce application can then be applied to be personally served on the Respondent by way of a process server or court bailiff.

If you are at all unsure about what to do, or if the Acknowledgement of Service hasn’t been completed and returned to the court, then it is best to speak to a family law solicitor.

A Conditional Order is the interim stage of the divorce. You can apply for the Conditional Order 20 weeks after the court has issued the divorce application. This timeframe provides a “cooling off period” to give you time to evaluate if you still wish to proceed.

The Conditional Order confirms you are entitled to a divorce, but it does not mean that you are divorced yet. A Conditional Order must be obtained as only then will the court consider making a Final Order in relation to the split of finances.

The Final Order is a legal document that will officially bring an end to your marriage. It can
be applied for six weeks and a day after the Conditional Order was granted. It is advisable not to apply for the Final Order until financial matters have been resolved. The court will send the Final Order to both parties or to the solicitors who are acting for them. Once this is granted, you are officially no longer married.

Top tip: At this time you may have questions about changing your surname after a divorce. You can read more about this in our article: Does my name change when I get a divorce?

For more information about our services, or if you are looking for reliable and accredited legal advice regarding your divorce, speak to one of our team today.

How long does a divorce take? 
By way of an approximate time scale the shortest time period is typically 6 months due to the minimum mandatory waiting periods. However, a divorce can take longer – such as where there are delays due to financial arrangements yet to be agreed, then it is possible for one party to ask the court to delay the Final Order.

How common is it for a partner to contest a divorce? 
It is no longer possible to defend a divorce – but it may be possible to dispute the divorce under limited grounds such as jurisdiction.

How will divorce affect your shared finances and home?  
The divorce process itself won’t have a direct bearing on arrangements for children or the matrimonial finances. These points are dealt with by way of separate applications through the court. Of course, if you can reach agreement on issues relating to division of finances and living arrangements relating to the children then court intervention is minimal.

If possible, consider trying to sort division of your finances before you apply for divorce. If you can reach an agreement between you this will help save legal costs.

However, if you cannot, then it is advisable to see a solicitor to help you achieve a financial settlement. A solicitor can also advise and help you once you have reached agreement and explain how to make the agreement legally binding.

There are options when it comes to your shared home. The house could be sold or one person’s share could be transferred to the other.

Dividing assets can be stressful, but you can read all about it in our guide, Understanding Your Assets During a Divorce.

There should be full financial disclosure between the two of you so that you are fully aware of the total assets in the matrimonial pot. This is often done by completion of Form E and providing the supporting documentation that it requests.

Can you get legal aid for a divorce? 
Legal aid is no longer available for any legal costs in relation to a divorce unless there has been domestic abuse, violence or child abduction.

We do not offer legal aid at Hawkins Family Law, but you can check whether you are eligible for legal aid on the government website.

Can you get divorced without a solicitor? 
The simple answer is yes. You can complete the divorce documents online yourself or use an online agent for a fee. You will still be responsible to pay the court fee of £593 even without a solicitor. Generally, the more important aspects of getting a divorce relate to sorting out your finances and any child arrangements.

A solicitor will be able to deal with paperwork and communicate with the court which can help reduce stress levels, knowing that you have a professional helping to organise your proceedings. A solicitor can also communicate with your spouse so that you don’t have to which can be helpful when a relationship has broken down completely

How much does a divorce cost in the UK? 
In England and Wales, the court charges a fee of £593 for processing a divorce. There will be additional costs if you decide to instruct a solicitor to deal with the divorce paperwork. Any fees relating to disputes over finances or arrangements for children may incur additional costs.

Be wary that costs can escalate if you become embroiled in disputes and conflict, usually in relation to financial arrangements or the division of time the children are to spend with each parent. Sometimes it is necessary to pursue a point and cannot be helped, but we will guide you if we think there are unrealistic expectations on either side.

Other things can affect the cost of a divorce. You can read more about divorce costs in our blog: How much does a divorce cost?

We would always recommend asking a solicitor for assistance with divorce proceedings. This can avoid any unnecessary delays and ensure that all the paperwork is completed correctly. If you’re not sure of the next steps to take, get in touch. We can work with you and discuss the best options for your situation.

Ready to take the next step? Talk to us in confidence and find out where you stand. Our team of divorce and family law specialists – in London, Milton Keynes, Bicester and Watford – can advise and guide you from the moment we start working with you. Get in touch – we’re here to help.

This article is intended for the use of our clients and other interested parties. The information contained in it reflects the author’s view and is believed to be correct at the date of publication. However, it is necessarily of a brief and general nature and should not be relied upon as a substitute for specific professional legal advice.