How to Prepare for Your First Meeting with Your Divorce Lawyer

The first meeting is primarily an exchange of information between solicitor and client. Your solicitor will then be able to start providing specific legal advice which will help you in thinking ahead and planning the next stages of your divorce.

I usually start an initial meeting by obtaining background information covering the mechanics of separation, your general circumstances, and financial information. This allows me to build a picture of your situation and your needs. After taking details of date of marriage, approximate date of commencement of cohabitation prior to marriage (a seamless period of cohabitation before marriage is added onto the length of the marriage itself by the court), names and dates of birth of everyone concerned including the children, I then usually move on to finding out what is in the financial pot. The following covers general questions asked and will allow you to have a think prior to your meeting of how much things are worth so that you can then provide that information more easily:

• Approximate value of any properties (don’t generally undertake valuations of properties prior to the first meeting as these are often done on a joint basis with your ex-partner).

• Who owns the property? If you know whether it is held as joint tenants or tenants in common then that is useful information to give to your solicitor. However, please do not worry if this makes no sense to you as your solicitor will explain at the first meeting and be able to find out for you.

• How much is outstanding on any mortgages / secured loans on properties and are these currently on an interest only basis or capital and interest repayment? When does any fix terms expire and what is your current interest rate and monthly mortgage payment?

• Details of your bank accounts are helpful. Divide up into accounts held in your sole name and accounts held jointly with anyone else, including your ex-partner. Approximate balances of the accounts and advice as to what each account is used for is helpful. If, for example, there are savings in the joint account and there is a worry that the other person may withdraw savings from the account then awareness of this can lead to discussion as to whether it would be prudent to freeze the account at this stage or take alternative steps to safeguard the money.

• Do you have any ISAs or other types of saving / investment elsewhere (shares perhaps?) in which case bring along information relating to amount held / invested and where the money is invested.

• Does anyone owe you any money or do you owe anyone any money? It is fairly common for a family member to have lent money and it is important that you tell your solicitor about any money that has come into the relationship from an external source such as an inheritance /gift or loan from a family member or someone else.

• Are there any other assets of worth – for example collections /cars /bikes /antiques?

• What debts / liabilities are there? Who are these with, what do they relate to, what was the money used for and how much roughly is outstanding on the debt?

• You will be asked about pensions. If you have a money purchase / defined contribution pension then you may be able to obtain a transfer value online before your meeting which is helpful. If you have a defined benefit pension, such as an occupational pension, then you will not be able to obtain up-to-date information of the transfer value very quickly but may have an annual statement that you could look at prior to the meeting to get an idea as to how much your pension is worth. Don’t worry if you don’t have this information; telling a solicitor that you have pensions and who they are with is often the extent of the information people are able to provide at the first meeting and enquiries in relation to the value of pensions can be made further down the line.

• What is the income of you and your ex-partner (as far as you are aware) from all sources, ideally gross and net? If you have your P60 and, if relevant, a tax computation from the last year then the information on that can be useful to bring along to a first meeting.

• If either of you have a business, then annual accounts for the last 2 years would be helpful to take along to your first meeting. There will be additional questions and information your solicitor will need dependant on the complexity of the business, but an idea of dividends paid out and to whom over the last 2 years, Directors loans and general buoyancy/liquidity of the business and liquid cash held will be helpful on an initial appraisal. Remember, you are the expert on your own business and help your solicitor understand the mechanics of it. Input from your accountant will no doubt be needed down the line.

• Are you living beyond your means each month? What is your shortfall or surplus of income? This is useful to discuss in the first meeting to see whether an immediate financial contribution should be requested from your ex-partner. Consideration will be given as to how bills will continue to be paid and who should contribute and to what extent.

Please do not bring in reams of bank statements. This will prove a distraction to you and your solicitor in the first meeting. As your matter progresses you will be undertaking financial disclosure with your ex-partner which will involve producing copies of financial documentation such as bank statements. But for the first meeting it is really a case of quantifying assets and liabilities and getting a general financial picture which enables your solicitor to then tailor their information and advice. Please also remember that a lot of people attend a first meeting with their solicitor without having done any preparation work at all and can still produce very approximate figures on most of the information requested above which again is sufficient for your solicitor to get a financial overview.

Are there any immediate issues that need addressing? These could relate to:

• Who occupies the family home and how?

• Any incidents of domestic violence? If there has been violence / abuse in your marriage then your solicitor will want details of approximate dates as well as details of what has happened. It can help to compile a chronology setting out approximate dates with just a short synopsis by each date in relation to what happened that you can then go into in more detail with your solicitor when you meet. Of course, abuse is not always date specific and details of ongoing abuse and harassment of whatever nature should be flagged up with your solicitor at the first meeting.

• Are there any immediate needs that need to be met in relation to the children? Is there any dispute over the time the children are spending with each parent (more likely to arise if you are already living in different households)? If so, this needs to be raised and discussed so that your solicitor can advise accordingly.

You may find it helpful to bring along a friend or family member to listen to what is discussed but please do not worry if either you are unable to or would prefer to come on your own. Most clients do attend their first meeting on their own and I find that they benefit greatly from a detailed advice letter sent to them after the meeting setting out what was discussed and confirming information given. This letter is optional, but often my clients find it invaluable.

Finally, remember that your solicitor is there to support you and is an ally. You may feel nervous in meeting a solicitor for the first time in relation to what is a very personal matter, but a good solicitor should put you at your ease. The solicitor / client relationship is important and very much a two-way thing.

Ready to take the next step? Talk to us in confidence and find out where you stand. Our team of divorce and family law specialists – in London, Milton Keynes, Bicester and Watford – can advise and guide you from the moment we start working with you. Get in touch – we’re here to help.

This article is intended for the use of our clients and other interested parties. The information contained in it reflects the author’s view and is believed to be correct at the date of publication. However, it is necessarily of a brief and general nature and should not be relied upon as a substitute for specific professional legal advice.