The Do’s and Don’ts of Navigating Divorce

Going through a divorce can be a stressful, confusing, and difficult time. It is important to know from the outset that it is not a quick process, especially if children are involved. At the very minimum the process takes at least 6 months, but this varies according to the complexity of the issues.

Our team of divorce lawyers in Milton Keynes can guide you through the entire process but this article offers an overview of the do’s and don’ts when navigating divorce.

Divorce happens in stages, often with one or both of you deciding to separate. There will be discussions surrounding the children, your living arrangements, finances, and property. You will need to consider short-term arrangements and make important decisions about what the future looks like.

However, the most difficult decisions usually surround the arrangements for children. This tends to cause the most animosity between spouses. It is important to consider the impact on the children and the best way to navigate the decisions that need to be made for their wellbeing. Their interests should always be paramount but agreeing what is best for them is not always easy. It is worth seeking advice early on so that you know what to expect, and how to deal with these unprecedented times.

Navigating divorce is very daunting and having a good support system is imperative. It is important to get professional legal advice regarding the division of assets, future finances, and the overall divorce process. Taking time to consider these life changing decisions and their consequences is crucial. It is important not to rush or be impulsive when emotions are running high. You should be fully informed of the consequences of anything that is decided now, and the impact that it will have on your future.

To make the process easier, it is often best to try and make decisions together with the support of a mediator or family solicitor. Taking everything step-by-step and being guided will alleviate some of the stress. The court process should be the very last resort when important decisions cannot be agreed, or where there were serious issues throughout the marriage. This could lead to a more costly, drawn-out process, and often causes more conflict between spouses. However, it can also assist where there is ongoing conflict that cannot be resolved.

At Hawkins Family Law, we recognise that additional emotional support could be crucial to your wellbeing. The legal issues are critical, but we feel that the emotional support that comes from counselling could be important when working through potentially difficult and challenging times. It can also help provide essential clarity around difficult decision making. To help you through the process and beyond we can offer high-quality counselling with our consultant psychotherapists, Emma Chamberlain and Dirk Griffin.

There is no doubting that going through a divorce is difficult, after all, you are entering a time of uncertainty. This can be made harder if you continually blame each other for the breakdown of the marriage, which inevitably causes long-drawn-out battles that places even more pressure on each other. Coming to a mutual resolution is often the preferred method of dealing with separation and can create a much easier process.

Of course, this cannot always be achieved, especially when there have been serious issues during the marriage. However, some of the biggest mistakes that divorcing couples make include involving the children in disputes, harassing one another, making threats, trying to hide assets, and having unrealistic expectations. This should be avoided at all costs, as the divorce process is hard enough without having to deal with these additional obstacles.

In the first instance, the objective is to achieve fairness when dividing assets on divorce. This means that often the starting point is to split everything 50/50. However, this is not always possible, and the courts have wide discretion as to what each of you are entitled to. They will look at the factors contained in section 25 of the Matrimonial Causes Act 1973, and these include:

• Income and earning capacity
• Your financial needs and obligations
• The standard of living enjoyed during the marriage
• Your ages and duration of the marriage
• Any disabilities that affect you or your spouse
• Contributions made during the marriage, or for the foreseeable future, either as breadwinner or homemaker
• Yours and your spouse’s conduct

However, the needs and welfare of the children will always be paramount, and this will be the first consideration of the court. Therefore, it is difficult to ascertain exactly what you would be entitled to on divorce. Overall, the end goal is to achieve a clean break whereby each of you can eventually be financially independent of one another. In some cases, this is straightforward, but often this will be achieved at some point in the future, when for instance the children are no longer minors.

Ready to take the next step? As leading divorce lawyers in Milton Keynes, our team of family law specialists can advise and guide you from the moment we start working with you. We also have offices in in Bicester, Watford and London. Talk to us in confidence and find out where you stand. Get in touch – we’re here to help.

This article was written by Joanna Kwadrans and Alex Stocker

This article is intended for the use of our clients and other interested parties. The information contained in it reflects the author’s view and is believed to be correct at the date of publication. However, it is necessarily of a brief and general nature and should not be relied upon as a substitute for specific professional legal advice.